NFL Pre-Season: Don't Take the Cheese

Here goes.

#4: Brett Farve will retire. Do I really even need to elaborate?

#5: The Bills will go 0-16. I can't believe this and still want to wake up in the morning. Help a OG out.

#6: The Cowgirls can win when it counts with Wade Phillips. Fire him, go get Cowher or SOMEBODY else! For someone who takes all kinds of risks as way of doing business, and is good at it, it strikes me as odd that Jerry Jones is content with Wade Phillips as his head coach.

LOL! Nice Cheese Talk Double C!

Mozzerella--The Raiders have a winning record; They are rebuilding with Jason Campbell who still make some question his capabilities.

Cheddar--The Jets being crowned the Super Bowl Champs; They are a Good squad with a lovable coach and lots of hoodspa. However, they need to work in PR because their publicity of themselves are rubbing off on the media. They'll be good but not "Super" Champs. The Colts will knock at that door too in the playoffs.

Sharp--That the Eagles are going to continue where they left off after McNabb left. McNabb was key to Philly since he was drafted in 1999. We have to remember that he other top guy in the '99 Draft was Ricky Williams. If Ricky pulled that retirement stuff on Philly, it would have been ugly quickly! D-Mac was Good for the E-A-G-L-E-S EAGLES! and his replacement is capable of winning but McNabb will show what he's made of for years to come to his former team.

Cottage--I think that some people are a little too big on Detriot. I think that the Motor City (Ford is Awesome) has seen arguably some of the worst from the Lions than the Cleveland Sports scene combined and deserve a breather. I think that day is coming but not as soon as people think. I agree that they will be good but this year they will be able to be respected in some games like the Raiders were but get respect with at least a 6-10 record.

My cheese:

Cheese #1: Brett Favre might not play because his ankle hurts. Stop it. Just stop it right now. He's got a team that was, as he knows all too well, one bad throw over the middle from going to the Super Bowl and coming back intact, and Brett Favre is going to pass on the chance to get a second ring? And to erase [I]that[I] as the final memory we all have of him? Please.

Cheese #2: ___________ went 4-0 in the pre-season, put up great numbers, and is therefore a team to be reckoned with this season. (I have my Browns in mind on this one).

Cheese #3: Someone besides the San Diego Chargers might win the AFC West. Not buying it. I do like the Raiders to improve a good deal, but nobody else is getting near the bullies of recent years out west. Even without LaDanian (Don't Call Him LT) Tomlinson and maybe without Vincent Jackson and/or Marcus McNeil. Who knows. But that Charger team is several steps ahead of everybody else in that division, and it's theirs again in 2010.

The Chicago Bears are going places with Jay Cutler. Because his rocket arm is so prolific in casting spells (which we Broncos fans were under), he bewitches fanbases into thinking he is a legitimate championship-caliber quarterback. There's my cheddar for you

Cheese: Matt Leinart, Vince Young, Kyle Orton and Jason Campbell are awful.
Cheese: Jay Cutler is not awful.

Cheese #4: X team has the easiest schedule of anybody based on winning percentage from last year. Winning percentage from last year. Using stats from last year to try to prove a point is not a good idea. If guys would just say, "They play a lot of tough teams this year because it looks like those rosters are still strong," they would be more accurate and save some grief.

Cheese #5: ---- will be playing a top team schedule. All but two games are decided by the divisional games and which two other divisions a team plays in the season.

Now, I do believe that certain teams get schedule benefits, but using stats from the previous year is not a good way to do it. For instance, people expect the Lions to do better this year, but I still have them pegged at 2-14 this year because they happen to play a couple of a divisions that have what should be tough teams. Team like the Lions, Browns and Rams may improve on the field but not with record.

Ok - time to squeeze the cheese...statements that seem to be correct now but are really way off? Here comes the stuff on cheese'ometer:

The Cowboys will be able to finish drives when the season starts. More cheese...Mike Martz and Rod Marinelli will do better paired in chicago than they did in Detroit. The Lions will play competitive football this year. Jimmy Clausen is good enough to start. The colts will be able to run the ball better this year. (I watched some of that game against SF - holy mackerel are they lost on run blocking.) The Chargers will play well in the playoffs this year.

-That preseason wins are important.The Colts have won a total of 4 preseason games in the last 5 years!
-If Peyton Manning goes down were finished....wait...thats Steak and Lobster right there!
-fans want an 18 game schedule...cheez-whiz
-its not about the money for a free agent....95 % cheese

Originally Posted by FootballSickness

My cheese:


Cheese #3: Someone besides the San Diego Chargers might win the AFC West. Not buying it. I do like the Raiders to improve a good deal, but nobody else is getting near the bullies of recent years out west. Even without LaDanian (Don't Call Him LT) Tomlinson and maybe without Vincent Jackson and/or Marcus McNeil. Who knows. But that Charger team is several steps ahead of everybody else in that division, and it's theirs again in 2010.

It's not that I think SD wont win the division...but I do think their window is closing both in the AFC West and, obviously, in the AFC picture overall...I don't know if it's Norv or what but they just can't seem to get over that hump., Maybe Tomlinson was holding them back a bit...who knows but I think they need to come out guns blazing this year, no more slow starts, otherwise...that division might just be good enough to catch them.

Cheese #4 - If something happens to Peyton Manning the Colts are really screwed!!

Oh wait, that is 100% correct and the Colts has done nothing in the off season to address their backup QB needs. Sorry guys, I think I missed the point.

Originally Posted by FootballSickness

My cheese:

Cheese #1: Brett Favre might not play because his ankle hurts. Stop it. Just stop it right now. He's got a team that was, as he knows all too well, one bad throw over the middle from going to the Super Bowl and coming back intact, and Brett Favre is going to pass on the chance to get a second ring? And to erase [I]that[I] as the final memory we all have of him? Please.

Cheese #2: ___________ went 4-0 in the pre-season, put up great numbers, and is therefore a team to be reckoned with this season. (I have my Browns in mind on this one).

Cheese #3: Someone besides the San Diego Chargers might win the AFC West. Not buying it. I do like the Raiders to improve a good deal, but nobody else is getting near the bullies of recent years out west. Even without LaDanian (Don't Call Him LT) Tomlinson and maybe without Vincent Jackson and/or Marcus McNeil. Who knows. But that Charger team is several steps ahead of everybody else in that division, and it's theirs again in 2010.

Ha. Brown cheese is never good. I almost bit today reading about Jake and his performance. Finally the Browns have a "Pro QB." It almost got me.

Phew - take a couple days away and miss a lot on this website - I think I'm all caught up now. As for more cheese news - for the sake of Buffalo - I hope something good happens to the point where somebody can at least make up some cheese lines.

The more I think about it, I think we really can as general as this:

Every single article written during the preseason that does not talk about the possible impact of the most recent key injury during practice or preseason.

I now think more and more that it is good for the players to be mostly sequestered during training camp, because I think it would drive me nuts watching the veteran player on a team that he knows will be bad talk about optimism in camp.

Headline in Cleveland Plain Dealer today, "Offense is confident after an impressive start." If Seneca Wallace is going to have to throw to the back-up tight end for Cleveland to be successful, then I might as well see if I have any bullets left in my arm.

Confidence = good. Actually thinking what happened will definitely lead to regular season results = bad. Cumberland College bad.

Originally Posted by Cris Collinsworth

Ha. Brown cheese is never good. I almost bit today reading about Jake and his performance. Finally the Browns have a "Pro QB." It almost got me.

Hahaha no, brown cheese is rancid and nasty, and will probably give you a virus.

Limburger cheese - Da Bills & Da Rams ... nobody wants to bite into that !

Brie - The Raiders will be a playoff team ... I have tasted some myself but I'm beginning to see that the WR corp is going to be this teams Achilles heel.

Cheddar - The Jets are one of the favorites to get to the Super Bowl ... Don't see Mark Sanchez as a Super Bowl QB.

Brunost cheese (Norway) - a brown whey cheese ... The Vikings can be a playoff team with Tarvaris Jackson as QB ... Nooooooooooo Waaaaaaayyyyyy !!!

Casu Marzu: Donovan McNabb will make the Redskins better than the Eagles this year. Still have that line, still has only two receivers, still has to play in the NFC East. Kevin Kolb is more accurate, still has that line, still has three receivers, still has that defense. And where McNabb has to play the Eagles twice, Kolb gets to play the Redskins twice.

Here is my big cheese, and not the one on my head. " The pre-season means everything and will determine who goes to the Super Bowl" NOT

Originally Posted by Cris Collinsworth

Ha. Brown cheese is never good. I almost bit today reading about Jake and his performance. Finally the Browns have a "Pro QB." It almost got me.

There is 'pungent cheese' and then there is 'repugnant cheese'.

Think of a combo of Stilton & Gloucetser left on the back porch, in the shade, in 95+ degree heat for a week or so...unpalatable.

Originally Posted by GoBigOrGoHome

There is 'pungent cheese' and then there is 'repugnant cheese'.

Think of a combo of Stilton & Gloucetser left on the back porch, in the shade, in 95+ degree heat for a week or so...unpalatable.

So Jake Delhomme = Stilton + Gloucester. I like it.

I'm also not buying the 49ers cheese. Until they get an actual NFL quarterback they will be stuck at 8-8.

Originally Posted by msclemons

So Jake Delhomme = Stilton + Gloucester. I like it.

I'm also not buying the 49ers cheese. Until they get an actual NFL quarterback they will be stuck at 8-8.

Old, worn down, and really stinky? 'Bout right for Jake the Mistake.